nine Bad Bosses, and How to Work for Them

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Some bosses are simply … terrible. Bad bosses are poor delegators and annoying micromanagers, or they're self-indulgently obsessed with the office gossip. Others are slackers — or and then busy they're only bachelor on Slack, where they constantly ignore your messages. And hither's something everyone should think well-nigh: the boss who asks, "Exercise yous have children?"

The Cutting's "Ask a Boss" columnist Alison Green has answered letters from readers with irritatingly bad bosses. Hither'due south her best communication on how to survive working for them.

What'due south appropriate for your dominate to consul to you, and what's not? Especially when your boss asks you to do elementary tasks — every bit in: very basic duties that are part of their job — they're walking a thin line between what's fair for yous to do and what's non. If y'all don't consummate the piece of work for them, no i else will. What tin yous actually do?

Commonly it makes sense for the more junior person to aid free upward a manager's time. "It sounds like a lot of the tasks you're wondering nigh are ones that information technology likely does make sense to consul to you. Simply non all of them," Dark-green writes. Before you consider quitting, think about information technology as an opportunity, like this.

Some bosses are so busy they're never gratis to talk — maybe they're merely reachable via instant messaging or email, merely rarely e'er respond. How tin can y'all get more attention from your boss? "Am I expecting too much from my manager given that he'due south so busy?" this reader wonders. "Should I just suck it up and learn to forever find my own answers?"

Often, this kind of boss has no idea that y'all need help or that they're ignoring you lot, Green says. They're just busy. "People assume that if their boss is assigning them a ton of piece of work, there'southward no point in speaking up considering they must be expected to notice a way to get it all done, when in fact the dominate is assuming they'll speak up if it becomes a problem. So the boss goes on thinking everything is fine while the employee is stewing and feeling overwhelmed." Here'due south how to talk to your boss about it.

Ever experience like you lot're babysitting your own dominate, then they finally get something done? "My dominate won't do anything unless y'all sit in her office and await for her to do it," this reader writes. Some bosses are genuinely busy, but others are just … lazy. Which tin impact your own productivity equally their employee, because it's so taxing to piece of work for someone who's unproductive.

"I get that information technology's frustrating — infuriating, even — just I think you're discounting how much this is non your trouble to solve," Greenish replies. "Information technology'southward her dominate'south to fix." Just if your boss's boss doesn't talk to her about it, there's not much you can do. Think about your options.

Ah, yes, the question you should never ask a co-worker. This reader points out why it'southward an inappropriate topic: "Maybe I'm infertile. Maybe my husband is. Peradventure we tried for years before giving up. Mayhap someone has a genetic disorder we're afraid to pass on." It doesn't affair if none of those things are truthful, because for someone else, they could be. Only when your boss is asking the question … what can you do?

"You volition be doing all of gild a favor if you point this out to him," Green writes. You can even do it cheerfully. Hither's how to bring it upward.

This reader'south boss comes into the office sick all the time and stages a horror scene amidst her employees: "She coughs into her hand and touches the phone and other desk items we share, finer spreading her germs far and wide. … As much every bit we arm ourselves with hand sanitizers, Clorox wipes, Lysol, flu shots, and, in the case of 1 colleague, rubber gloves, sometimes we catch her illnesses." Hello: That's icky.

Usually, you tin can't be sure where germs are actually coming from, Green says. And then do a reality-cheque first: Possibly your boss did get yous sick, or possibly you lot picked up a issues on the subway. However, if it happens once again and again with someone like this boss, you can't just inquire if she'southward seen a doctor. That approach says "'I'yard concerned about you,' when the message y'all really need to evangelize is 'I'm concerned about the remainder of u.s.a.,'" Greenish writes. Here's something better to say.

When you report to two people who despise each other and vent to you about information technology — and there's no Hr department — you're in a terrible position. You're right in the middle of them. Merely there are plenty of things you tin exercise to make your life less miserable.

When one dominate starts venting about the other, Green recommends telling them it's awkward for you to listen. "Sometimes with people like this, yous tin get more traction if yous brand your request for boundaries more nearly yous than about them," she writes. Read more suggestions hither.

When a dominate constantly corrects tiny mistakes or decides to completely redo your work behind your back, first it'south worth asking yourself why they're existence so easily-on. "For example, if your work quality hasn't been where it should be, or if a project is very high-stakes, or even if you lot're simply new and even so getting acclimated to the chore, a good manager would go more closely involved," Dark-green writes.

But if none of those things ring true, then talk to your boss. "Try to (a) get a better agreement of what's driving his behavior and (b) see if he'd be open to doing things differently." Here's what to say, word for word.

Maybe you ever desire to tell your manager, "I told you so." This reader's boss often asks for her opinion, disagrees, and afterward changes his listen when it turns out that she was right. She wants to know: How can she make him heed and agree with her the first time around?

"I can see why this is frustrating," Green replies, "merely asking for your opinion isn't a promise to concur with your opinion or to act on it." Information technology'll exist less annoying if you try seeing things this way.

Later giving your iv weeks' notice, what if a boss continues to deed equally if y'all're never leaving the company? As in: giving you more work to do, and constantly joking that yous're not actually moving on. This reader quit her job but still cares about her company. Before she leaves, she wants to take the time to aid smooth the transition for her replacement — by creating a transition certificate, for example. But her boss doesn't requite her the fourth dimension to do information technology.

"Typically when people leave a job, that's it — they're washed with information technology," Green writes. She advises telling a boss "what y'all volition and won't do later on you're gone — and what y'all withal need to get done before y'all get out." Read more than.

Got something to Ask a Boss? Ship your questions to askaboss@nymag.com .

nine Bad Bosses, and How to Work for Them